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john, owner - john currently owns ready heli, but works for all of you...when he is not living, eating and sleeping your heli needs he is busy with his kids, playing drums, fishing, shooting and tilling his garden. since his recent acquisition of a margarita machine, we havent seen much of john. we hear neighbors stop at johns house after work instead of the local watering hole. if tapped, johns mouth can power the european union for 37 minutes.
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jennifer, owner - jen is the co-owner of ready heli and enjoys spending time with her other family here, serving you all. when she is not working, she is spending time with her 3 kids, 4 if you count john, her husband. jen once slapped her shadow because it was standing too close to her. it now stands a safe 30 feet behind her. jen was asked to leave the set of sex and the city in the beginning because the other four women were jealous that all the men liked her.
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bryan, shipping manager - bryan hails from the uk, and runs the daily operations here and makes sure your packages get sent out correctly. once someone asked him the secret to how we get our packages out so fast...bryan told him the secret was on the bottom of his boot. no one asks him for the secret anymore. bryan enjoys giving the guinness beer company all his spare change. bryan drives an ice cream truck covered in skulls.
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 | eyal, purchasing manager -
eyal joined us after relocating to south florida in search of
greener pastures. we hear the mossad has kicked him out of Israel for
being too dangerous with his special ops ninja skills. he also likes to
argue. if you have five dollars and eyal has five dollars, he always
has more money then you. he is suing myspace for taking the name of
what he calls everything around you.
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 | suzi, customer relationship manager - suzi knows about excellent service. in her former job, she handled team heli pilots and customer needs for a well respected blade manufacturer. being a heli pilot herself, we hear she is working hard on her chaos and pirouetting tic-tocs. outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with suzi.
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christy, office manager - christy has jumped onto the dark side to help corral our accounts payable, accounts receivables, payroll, and keep everyones supplies promptly replenished. She likes long walks on the beach, Barry White music, Harlequin romance novels, songbirds, rainbows, and quiet time with her soulmate just before she roundhouse kicks him in the face.
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 | marc, shipping
- marc is the newest member of the shipping team and a taiwanese crime fighter on the side. when he is not packing your orders and throwing grapes at old people he is an aspiring filmmaker and teaches romero and tarantino how to tie their shoes. tay zonday once challenged marc to a cage match. marc won. tays punishment was to spend the rest of his career making stupid music videos on youtube. the rest is history. |
| baron, shipping - we hired baron after watching him deliver pizzas...dominos had to change there slogan from "30 minutes or its free" to "30 minutes digested or its free." the show survivor had the original premise of putting people
on an island with baron. there were no survivors, and
nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the
footage. |
| | kyle, shipping
- we found kyle in berlin at a rave parade, where he was teaching the techno vikings how to dance. he is also responsible for choreographing the indian thriller video. steve jobs pays kyle 99 cents every time he listens to one of his songs. |
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 | cody, shipping
- cody joins us from oregon where he was kicked off the show axe man for knocking down a whole forest with his roundhouse kicks. he did a photo shoot for a new flannel company and everytime they exposed the film it only showed cody as a ghostly figure, thereby verifying the claims that he is not from this life. the game oregon trail was written about cody and his quest to get to a party across the woods.
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casey, shipping - casey is the quietest member of the team...when he is not working in the shipping order, he is aspiring to be a singer/songwriter. casey was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds. |
| ron, inventory specialist - sgt. ron recently returned back from the middle east where he managed the armys helicopter parts inventory...he can order you a black hawk equipped with full ordnance...but we think hes more then qualified to handle your rc parts needs. we welcome him on the team and hide all johns guns from him. he keeps taking them apart to check for desert sand every day.
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